Uko wabyitwaramo igihe umwana wawe w’umwangavu akubwiye ko atwite
Kubwirwa ko umwana wawe w’umukobwa w’umwangavu atwite birababaza ndetse bikanatera ihungabana haba ku mubyeyi no ku mwana. Ahanini ibyo biterwa no kuba umwana wari umwitezeho ahazaza heza, kuzana amanota meza mu ishuri, n’ibindi bintu byiza bitandukanye cyane no kumva akubwira ko atwite ,wenda rimwe na rimwe utanamukekeraga ko anafite inshuti y’umuhungu.
Dore uko umubyeyi yabyitwaramo kugirango abashe gufasha umwana nawe yifashe kwikura mu kibazo neza :
Banza ubitekerezeho mbere yo kugira ijambo umusubiza : Niba umwana wawe w’umukobwa akubwiye ko atwite banza utuze umwihorere ubitekerezeho neza mbere yo kugira ijambo umusubiza kuko ahanini amagambo ababyeyi bahita babwira abana arushaho kubahahamura.
Clarisse ni umwana w’umukobwa wabyaye afite imyaka 17 yagize ati : « Nkimara kumenya ko ntwite narahangayitse cyane mera nk’uwataye umutwe. Gusa byaje kuba nabi kurushaho umunsi nabwiraga ababyeyi ko ntwite, uwo munsi bahise bambwira nabi bahita banyirukana mu rugo ngo nsange uwa nteye inda ku buryo nashatse guhita niyahura. Nubwo ababyeyi bageze aho bakandeka nkagaruka mu rugo sindibagirwa uwo munsi banyirukanye bakanga kunyumva kandi aribo nari mfite bo kwitabaza bonyine”
Ihangane ureke kumwereka ko wamurakariye : Nubwo nk’umubyeyi wumva ko ubabaye mu mutima imbere geregeza kwereka umwana wawe ko utamurakariye umwereke ko uhangayikiye kumufasha akazasohoka mu bibazo arimo.
Mufashe kwiyakira no kumva ko ubuzima buzakomeza : Hari ubwo ababyeyi bananirwa kwakira abana babo bigatuma nabo batiyakira. Abenshi muri bo niho usanga bahita bajya kwishyingira bakiri bato, abandi bagatorongera bagahunga iwabo. Nyamara iyo umubyeyi afashije umwana kwiyakira biba n’umwanya mwiza wo kumenya uko uzamurinda mu gihe kizaza kuko iyo umwegereye ari mu kibazo utamurakariye akubwiza ukuri kose ku byamubayeho.
Umwiza ni umubyeyi ufite umwana w’umwangavu wabyaye afite imyaka 16 yagize ati : “ Umukobwa wanjye akimara kumbwira ko atwite nanjye ubwanjye narahungabanye kuko ntanamukekeraga ko byamubaho. Gusa nabonye kumurakarira byarushaho gukurura ibibazo ahubwo ndamwiyegereza nkamuba hafi. Yamaze imyaka ibiri nyuma asubira mu ishuri, ariko ndakubwira ngo yabaye umukobwa uzi gufata imyanzuro, ubu agira amanota meza kurusha ayo yagiraga mbere”
Ihanganire imyitwarire ye ya cyana igihe atwite : Umwana ukiri umwangavu iyo atwite agaragaza imyitwarire itandukanye n’iy’umugore mukuru. Gerageza kumwumva ubyihanganire kandi wirinde kumuhatira kwitara nk’abagore bakuru ahubwo umugire inama.
Clarisse yarongeye ati : “ mama yakundaga kumbwira amagambo anca intege ngo sindi umugore sindi ni umukobwa bikambabaza ndetse ugasanga we ashaka ko nitwara nk’abagore bakuru, namubaza uko nakitwara agahita ambwira ngo iyo umuntu atwite agomba kumenya ubwenge !
Irinde intekerezo zose zatuma ugira agahinda gakabije : Iyo ugize ikibazo umwana wawe agatwita irinde ibitekerezo bituma ugira gahinda gakabije nko kujya umugereranya naho abandi biganaga bageze, kwicira urubanza ukumva ko hari icyo utakoze gitwita kwe bikaba ari ikosa ryawe, kutishimira umwana azabyara n’ibindi bishobora gutuma ushobora gucikwa ukamubwira magambo mabi kubera intekerezo mbi wagize.
Mu by’ukuri nta muntu uba uzi nyuma y’ibihe murimo wowe n’umukobwa wawe ikiba kizakurikiraho cyaba cyiza cyangwa se kibi. Gusa ugomba kumenya ko ugomba kumufasha kandi nawe ukifasha kwakira iby’ababayeho no gukomeza mujya imbere aho kwibanda ku byashize.
Gracieuse Uwadata