Uburyo 4 ababyeyi bareramo n’ingaruka bigira ku mwana

Yanditswe: 14-03-2017

Buri mubyeyi usanga afite uburyo areramo abana be ( parenting styles) ahanini bitewe nuko ateye ndetse n’icyo atekereza ko umwana we amwifuzaho. Abenshi banabikora batabizi rimwe na rimwe bikagira ingaruka ku mwana. Menya uburyo 4 ababyeyi bakoresha mu kurera, umenye ubwawe n’ingaruka bishobora kugira ku mwana zirimo uburyo azitwara amaze kuba mukuru.

Umubyeyi w’umunyagitugu (authoritarian parent)

Umubyeyi uteye gutya usanga ashyiraho amategeko rimwe na rimwe akakaye kandi akizera ko abana be bagomba kuyakurikiza yose uko yakabaye ndetse ugasanga nta busoboranuro buhagije afite ku mpamvu zayo mategeko n’amabwiriza. Iyo umwana abajije impamvu yayo mabwiriza asubizwa gusa ngo “ Kuko arijye ubivuze”, “ndavuze ngo” n’ibindi. Bene uyu mubyeyi kandi usanga akoresha ibihano cyane kurusha uko yaha umwana isomo ku ikosa yakoze. Ibyo bituma umwana atekereza ku bubi bw’umubyeyi wamuhaye igihano kurusha ku bubi bw’ikosa yakoze.

Ingaruka zigera ku mwana urerwa gutya harimo: kwitakariza icyizere, gutinya ababyeyi be cyane, n’ibindi

Umubyeyi uba hafi umwana we kandi akamwumva( authoritative parent)

Umubyeyi uteye gutya usanga abana arera batagira ikibazo mu buzima. Usanga ari ababyeyi bumva abana kandi bakabizera. Bababa hafi mu buryo bwose bushoboka. Bene uyu mubyeyi ni ikinyuranyo cy’uwo tumaze kubona hejuru. Uyu we usanga aha abana amabwiriza akabasobanurira impamvu yayo kandi aziko ko bishoboka ko umwana atayakurikiza. Iyo ashyiraho amabwiriza usanga yifashisha ibyifuzo by’umwana
.
Abana barerwa muri ubu buryo usanga ari abana bishimye, badasunikira ingaruka z’ibyo bakoze ku bandi, kandi iyo bakuze baba ari abantu bazi gushyira mu bikorwa inshingano bahawe, bakaba banarangwa no gutinyuka gutanga ibitekerezo byabo

Umubyeyi wa ntibindeba ( neglectful parent)

Umubyeyi uteye gutya usanga nawe arera nabi kuko aba yigira ntibindeba. Uzasanga ibyo umwana akeneye ntacyo bimubwiye. Umwana akaba yabura imyenda kandi ababyeyi bakize. Akaubura umwitaho mu rugo kandi yirirwana na mama we wenda , .. mbese uzasanga ari ba bandi babyara ubundi umwana akirera. Haba mu buryo bwo kumuha ikinyabupfura no mu buryo bwo kumuha ibyo akeneye bindi bisanzwe.

Iyo ababayeyi ari ba ntibindeba abana babo bakura batifitiye icyizere, ndetse baranatsindwa cyane mu ishuri, kugira imyitwarire yihariye muri sosiyete no guhorana umunabi.

Umubyeyi wemerera umwana byose ( permissive parent)

Umubyeyi uteye utya usanga nta mabwiriza ajya aha umwana we mu buzima bwe. Ni wa mubyeyi udashaka kubangamira umwana niyo yaba ari ku kintu gifitiye umwana inyungu. Ashaka kandi kuba inshuti y’umwana kurusha uko ari umubyeyi we. Mbese ntaba ashaka kwica ubucuti bwe n’umwana. Rimwe ababyeyi babikora kuko undi mubyeyi akoresha uburyo bwa mbere bw’ubunyagitugu, ariko hari nubwo aba atinya gusa kwibabariza umwana.

Abana barezwe gutya usanga batamenya gufata ibyemezo, ntibazi nabo kwiyobora ubwabo, ntibazi guhitamo icyiza n’ikibi kuko bakuze babareka bagakora byose ( iyo yakoraga ikosa baramurekaga nta gihano, nta no kumucyaha)

Abana bakuze gutya kandi usanga banga amategeko cyane. Iyo umuhaye amabwiriza agomba gukurikiza aba yumva ari umutwaro kuri we kuko yamenyereye kwishyira akizana muri byose.

Uko wahitamo uburyo bwo kurera

Birashoboka ko wavuga uti ubu buryo ni bwiza nibwo ngiye guhitamo ariko na none usanga ababyeyi bamwe baba bavanze. Uyu munsi akaba umunyagitugu ejo akaba uwemerera umwana byose. Na none kandi biterwa n’ikigero umwana wawe arimo n’ibindi.
Gusa icyo ugomba guhorana mu mutwe ni icyo ushaka ko umwana wawe aba cyo. Niba ushaka ko azabaho ntacyo yitaho, umwanya wawe munini ujye umurera mu buryo bwa ntibindeba, niba ushaka ko umwana wawe azakurana urukundo n’indi mico mbonera, ubwo umwanya wawe munini uzawuharire uburyo bwo kuba hafi y’umwana ukamwumva.

Gracieuse Uwadata

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    Murakoze cyane

  • Murakoze cyane.nshobora kuba nayobozaga igitugu,ariko mbonye ibibi byabyo.

  • Murakoze,ikosa wahanira umwana niryo utamuhanira nirihe?

    • Nunu byaterwa n’ikigero umwana arimo n’icyateye umwana gukora ibyo yakoze wita ikosa. rimwe na rimwe abana bakora amakosa bitewe n’uburangazi bw’ababyeyi cyangwa se bakabikora batabizi kuko batabwiwe mbere ko ari amakosa.

      Ikindi akenshi ababyeyi birebaho aho kureba ku mwana no ku ikosa yakoze. urugero umwana ashobora guta ikaye ye ntumuhane kuko kwiga utabiha agaciro ariko yamena isukari wari ugiye gushyira mu cyayi wenda ari n’impanuka ukaba uramukubise.

      muri make ibyiza ni ukugendana n’ikigero cy’umwana kandi ukabanza kumuha amabwiriza amwereka ibiri amakosa n’ibitari amakosa ( akamenya aho atagomba kurenga ukurikije imyaka ye) .

      soma hano inkuru ijyanye no guhana umwana http://agasaro.com/spip.php?article4545

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