Ibyamufashije kwibagirwa intimba yatewe n’umugabo wa mbere

Yanditswe: 21-06-2015

Abantu benshi bibwira ko gushaka ubwa kabiri nta mahirwe abamo ndetse bamwe bagaca umugani ngo ‘wirukana umugore uguguna igufwa, ukazana urimira bunguri,’ nyamara ibyo si ko biri kuri bose kuko mu buhamya umubyeyi w’abana 4 yaduhaye, usanga kuri we yaragize amahoro nyuma yo kongera gushaka undi mugabo.

Uwo mubyeyi yagize ati : “ Natandukanye n’umugabo wa mbere tubyaranye abana 2, yari yaranzengereje ku buryo numvaga meze nk’umusazi, akankorera ibibi byinshi birimo kunkubita, kunca inyuma, ubusinzi, kunyima ibyo gutekera abana ahubwo twese akaza adukubita, n’ibindi bintu bibi byari byarakomerekeje umutima wanjye ku buryo numvaga narazinutswe abagabo burundu.

Tumaze kwaka gatanya namaze imyaka 3 ndera abana banjye, ndetse nkumva ariyo gahunda mfite kuko nari narazinutswe icyitwa umugabo. Hashize imyaka ine dutandukanye naje guhura n’umugabo na we watandukanye n’umugore wamusigiye umwana umwe tubyumva kimwe.

Niba wenda ari ukubera ko twese twari duhuje ibibazo, sinzi uko byagenze bya bindi nari narishyizemo ko ntazongera gushaka bimvamo. Ndetse n’ibyo abantu bambwiraga banca intege banyumvisha ko ashobora kuzaba mubi kurusha uwa mbere, bakananyereka imbogamizi zo kuba twese dufite abana nabyimye amatwi kuko mu mwaka twari tumaze dukundana nabonaga nta kibi kimuri ku mutima.

Twaje kubana ntahanayo abana banjye nsangayo n’uwe mwana, nyuma tuza kumvikana ko tuzabyarana umwana umwe gusa kugira ngo tubashe kurera n’abo bandi. Ubu bose tubafata nk’abana bacu kandi nabo baradukunda. Ari ba bandi nahatahanye bishimira kuba noneho baba mu muryango urimo amahoro ndetse na wa wundi nahasanze nawe ni uko.”

Ibyamufashije kubana neza n’umugabo yashatse bwa kabiri

Icya mbere cyamfashije ni ukwigira ku byari byarambayeho. Kuba nari narashatse nzi ko nzabana n’umugabo wanjye akaramata ariko ntibize gukunda byansigiye isomo mu buzima ku buryo numvaga ko ndamutse mbonye umugabo unkunda ntagomba gupfusha ubusa amahirwe mbonye, nanjye ngomba kumukunda akanyibagiza ibihe bibi nari naranyuzemo.

Icya kabiri cyabimfashijemo ni uguha agaciro ibyiza naboneye ku mugabo wa kabiri : Sinavuga ngo umugabo turi kumwe we ni umutagatifu, ariko na none iyo ushaka amahoro wirinda kubona ibibi gusa ahubwo ugahanga amaso ibyiza ubona k’uwo mwashakanye. Ibyiza mubonaho rero bindutira cyane ibibi afite kuko byo ntabiha agaciro cyane.

Ikindi navuga ko cyamfashije ni ugukunda abana bose kimwe kandi nabo bakatwemera bakadufata nk’ababyeyi babo : Nkuko abantu bangiraga inama babimbwiraga, koko ntibyari koroha ko mbonera amahoro mu rushako rwa kabiri mu gihe abana batumvikana hagati yabo ndetse no kuri twebwe ababyeyi babo. Sinzi Imana yabikoze rero aho yavuye kuko nanjye iyo mbitekereje birandenga.

Icya nyuma nasorezaho cyatumye mbona amahoro ni uko nizera uwo turi kumwe ubu. Mbere tukimara kubana twese twari dufite ibikomere ku buryo kwizerana byari bikomeye biturutse ku kuba twese twari twarahemukiwe nabo twari twarizeye. Uko iminsi ishira byagiye bidushiramo ubu turizerana, tubwirana buri cyose mbese nyine tujya tuvuga ko ariyo saha yacu yo gusubirizwamo.

Hari abantu bajyaga bibwira ko gushaka ubwa kabiri nta mahoro avamo nyamara n’ubwo tutakangurira abubatse gusenya ingo ngo bajye gushaka abandi, hari ubwo usanga ariwo muti muzima kurusha kwizirika ku muntu ukwangiriza ubuzima.

Agasaro.com

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